There are a few elements that come with this…. Are you defined by your condition or not? How do you view your neurodivergence? Is it a key part of you, or is it something separate?

This can be quite tricky.

Are you someone who says… I AM Autistic, for example or are you more comfortable by saying you HAVE autism or perhaps you LIVE WITH Autism.

There’s no wrong answer, but here we explore what the stances look like and what they may mean.

Self-acceptance is a journey, not a destination. It’s a path that we all walk, filled with twists and turns. When it comes to our neurodivergence, this journey takes on a unique flavour.

Neurodivergence as an Integral Part of Identity

For some, their neurodivergence is an intrinsic part of who they are. It shapes their worldview, influences their interactions, and is a fundamental aspect of their identity. Embracing neurodivergence as a core part of oneself can lead to profound self-acceptance. It allows individuals to understand themselves better, to see their differences as strengths, and to advocate for their needs from a position of strong self-identity.

Recognising Autism and ADHD as integral parts of a persons’ identity can be really empowering. It can help understand why the world is experienced differently and give the tools to leverage unique perspectives and abilities.

Viewing neurodivergence as a key part of one’s identity fosters a sense of belonging within the neurodivergent community. It encourages advocacy and self-empowerment, and it allows for a rich, authentic sense of self.

Neurodivergence as Separate from Core Identity

On the other hand, some people view their neurodivergence as a separate aspect of their identity. It’s a part of them, but it doesn’t define them. This perspective can be equally empowering. By viewing neurodivergence as a separate aspect, individuals can focus on a broader sense of self that includes, but is not limited to, their neurological differences.

While our conditions influence our behaviour and thought processes, they don’t define the entirety of who someone is. This approach helps in recognising and nurturing a wide range of personal attributes, talents, and aspirations.

There’s more to this topic than just the language involved, for some there’s a strong spiritual angle as well. For some people, the way they view the interaction between the mind, soul and body also matters. If you view the soul as the true self, you may view it as synonymous with the mind. Then you may ask if the mind is where the condition is and if so that impacts on how you view your Neurodivergence. On the other hand, you may view the soul as separate to the mind which means any neurodivergence is also separate.

These are pretty big, existential, philosophical questions.

So, let’s make things easier.

Whether you view your neurodivergence as an integral part of your identity or as a separate aspect, whether you are concerned with a soul or not, self-acceptance is about understanding and embracing your whole self. It’s about recognising your strengths and challenges and finding ways to thrive.

Reflecting on your perspective can be a valuable exercise. Ask yourself:

• How does my neurodivergence influence my daily life?
• Do I see it as a core part of who I am, or as something I manage alongside other aspects of my identity?
• How does my perspective shape my self-acceptance and my interactions with the world?
• Which feels more comfortable?

To say I HAVE neurodivergence , I LIVE WITH neurodivergence or to say I AM neurodivergent.

There’s no right or wrong answer here. It’s about finding what feels true for you and using that understanding to craft a fulfilling and authentic life.

Your experience is unique to you and just as valid as anyone else’s.